What’s wrong with your average Washington millionaire? The same upscale crowd that will bid $10 million for a Medina fixer-upper, $8 million for a lock of hair from the departed Kurt Cobain, or $6 million for a week’s supply of kosher, baby goat cheese freshly flown in from the jungles of Bangladesh, won’t even point their browsers at eBay long enough to ponder a former Washington State passenger-only ferry.
The Washington State Ferry System reported no takers in its attempt to sell the MV Chinnook for $4.5 million on eBay this past week. Imagine 350 of your friends being able to moon the common people requiring common heavily carbon-fueled on the 520 bridge as you escort them across the water aboard your very own $4.5 million muscle boat. It would be like seventh grade at Lakeside School all over again! If every upscale resident of the East Side had their very own ferry boat, the state wouldn’t even have to build a new floating bridge. The state might even have to consider widening Lake Washington all the way to Snoqualmie Pass.
Meanwhile, the Democratic race for President is heating up again, as Hillary Clinton attempted to interrupt Oscar Night in Hollywood with her bid to gain notice for her most recent Ohio campaign ad, called “No Country for Old Bitches.” In it, she berates her opponent Barrack Obama for not growing old on the campaign trail. “Shame on you Barrack Obama,” Clinton told a worldwide television audience of three billion people, “this is right out of the Peter Pan play book.”
Every Tuesday evening, you can watch up and coming, and still to come comedians taking the Mainstage to perform their art. Comedy has no predefined playbook and only the jokes sometimes grow old. If you’re tired of that same old Bangladesh goat cheese in your diet, perhaps you’ll want to take a bite out of your three to five minutes of fame? Open Mic comedy night at the Mainstage Comedy and Music Club begins at 7 pm every Tuesday and is hosted by one of Seattle’s best, Derek Sheen. Give it a shot — on stage and from the bar — as you stew over your performance. If you’ve got a song in your heart, you might want to try the musical open mic immediately afterwards. If you’re a success at both, could I get a ride on your new ferry boat?